I am certain that a day or two from now I would write something pithy or cute or inspiring or funny. Two and three days pass while I wait for eloquence to pass from my head to my fingertips, but the days run together and today becomes tomorrow time and time again.
Nevertheless, today begs for words, even if they are too mundane to express the things of today. Hopeful that they make sense to someone. Even if it is only me in 20 years.
A fire returned today that had gone cold. And though I am strong and intelligent and an advocate and stay on top of things, some days I just feel beaten and dragged down and weak and done. I know Who wins in the end, but sometimes it is dark there in the middle. Maybe it's static on a TV from the 50s - sort of dark and light at the same time. Black and white.
None of this even matters. I want to photograph my fridge and tell my kids how my head swims when they all talk at the same time and how my heart swells when Mattie tells me he befriended "Jermy" today and won Presidential for doing serious push-ups. And T who does his math unlike other 4th graders who come up with "30" by adding 29 to 1 but T figures 5,962 divided by 16 minus 342.625 is 30 and Sash plays with her imaginary friend and tells her, "It's OK, noboby likes me either" { :( } and Pookie is healed and it's still static but it is clear. I have to write this blog. Life isn't hi-def. It's full of static. But these words - though they are senseless - are sometimes everything we have to bring in the channels more clearly.
Thank you God.
