on opportunity

When you go through a struggle in this life, so often I think we look for the reason.  Really, there may be no real reason other than to say, "It's life."  I don't mean that statement in a nonchalant, flippant sort of way.  Two little words, but I mean them deeply, meaningfully ~ it is life.  Jesus said in the Bible that, 'in this life there will be trouble.'  He wasn't kidding.  If it's not one thing, it'll be another.  I guess as I have gotten older, seen babies born sick, seen children bullied at school, witnessed marriages crumble, jobs lost ... I understand more and more that everyone is going through something.  And if they aren't, they will be.

{Well hohoho to you Karin!}

What the rest of that Bible verse says, though, is “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace..."  There you go.

Though the world may - as the song goes - "move like mad,"  Jesus is faithful.  He alone gives us peace.

Pookie leads singer/song writer Erin Bode on a tour through St. Louis Children's Hospital

This post didn't start out as a message about Jesus.  We look - I look - for a reason for Katelyn to have had 6 open heart surgeries before she turned three.  Why she had to refrain from physical activity this entire fall while we waited with baited breath for news about her heart health.  Why in the midst of the already lengthy list of daily meds and blood draws did she have to break her arm, have a rash cover her face and neck that forced her to take even more medicines every day, why she is the one who is needing to have five teeth pulled, why?  Why?  What is the reason?

I don't know.  I don't know why.  I don't know what the reason is.  And in this life, I doubt I will know.

But here is what I do know. 

I have met best friends who also have children with heart conditions.  And they are amazing, amazing women.  I love them so much it brings me to tears.  And their kids?

My heart isn't big enough to hold my love for them all.  It spills over and flows into my very toes.

I have had to trust God - put everything into believing He will take care of me, my daughter, our family.

I know brilliant people who call themselves doctors and nurses whom we call friends.

Drs. Eghtesady and Van Hare interview with Pookie

We spent an amazing week in Hawaii swimming with dolphins, surfing, flying over waterfalls.

I have spoken to medical students and doctors in a filled lecture hall to make a difference in their eventual practices.

We have been asked to actively participate in fundraising efforts for heart research and education throughout our schools and this community via video as well as public speaking engagements.

These opportunities are all a direct result of the struggle Pookie endured as a young child and continues to rise above every day due to her heart condition.

Erin Bode with Pookie

And now recently?  Recently, this beautiful woman, Erin Bode, began writing a song about my sweet Katelyn ... and the beat of the song?  The rhythm of the music?  The soul of the melody?  Is Katelyn's heartbeat.

Erin listens to a recording of Pookie's heartbeat via a specialized stethoscope.

Can you even imagine?  I can't even wrap my head around any of it, really.  I can only step back and watch how God weaves this little life into His big story.

What if she'd never been born 'this way?'  What if she'd never had to face 'these struggles?'  What if I wasn't her mom?

Are you kidding?

I wouldn't have my life any other way.  So proud of my little Pookie.  So honored to be considered and asked by the hospital to participate in this amazing project.  So grateful to God for this life.