Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Demons


Do you hear the voices? The ones that whisper

you can't...
you haven't...
you didn't...
you won't...

into the cobweb~entrenched recesses of your mind?

I read a post last night from a mom who admitted that, at times, she feels like an absolute failure. Her words oozed wisdom from the very trenches of womanhood. She had obviously heard the voices of doubt, fear, shame echo through her skull, rendering her stuck in the moment with her disabling emotions. My heart ached for her last night. And today, I felt a connection.

I don't know why today of any day I felt helplessly lost in the negative. As I looked around, I saw unkempt piles here and there. I saw laundry unfinished and dishes to unload. I saw carpets unswept and an unhappy toddler. I saw unchecked boxes on my To Do list. I felt unloved. My heart felt overwhelmed.

How do you get through a day like today? It was an ordinary day by any standards. Kids to school, errands to run, meals to prepare, home to maintain. How do you get through a day where everyday tasks are ineffable?

I took a breath. I repeated: The Lord God is with you. He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with His love. He will rejoice over you with singing. Zeph. 3:17.

Really? He sings over me? He rejoices in me when everywhere I turn there are needs I haven't met? He delights in imperfect me? What kind of God stays with me, saves me, when the demons in my mind are no longer whispering of my imperfections but shouting their accusations, screaming them into my ear?

He quiets me.

He silences them.


My God.



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