My Dog Thinks I'm Mean

Lest you think my dog does not see me as a Giant Creep, get a gander of him here (notice him soaking up my cold air from that air vent):

His thoughts: Why don't you put on these fancy shoes and take me for a run?

My thoughts: Oh whadda cute widdle puppy...hey! Wait a minute! Get your drooly little mouth off my running shoes! I know where that mouth has been! And while you're at it, get off my air conditioning!